Avalanche
by AlinaLotus
Summary: He frightened her, excited her. He was like the edge of a very sharp knife, and she was entirely his.


**This is my first Naruto fic. I'm only in the beginning of the second arc, so I haven't seen very much at all, but already I am obsessed with it. **

**Warnings: AU, language. Also I'm sure this is OC for Kakashi, but that can't be helped. As always, feedback is appreciated. **

_I feel alive beside you  
And all at once  
I am whole again  
We fall into each other  
Your atmosphere  
Is all I'm breathing in  
And in this rush  
We are crushed_

_Carry me down  
Rolling in your arms  
Cause I can't remember  
Ever falling this hard  
Tell me tonight,  
All that we have been_

_Crashing down, crashing down,  
In your avalanche_

_These scars we wear remind us  
The more we change  
The more we're all the same  
Swept up in this emotion  
We fumble through and make the same mistakes  
Cause we are led  
To the edge_

_Carry me down  
Rolling in your arms  
Cause I can't remember  
Ever falling this hard  
Tell me tonight  
All that we have been_

_I feel alive beside you  
And all at once I am whole again..._

He says it like this, "I'll love you and never leave you and protect you, always, just give me that chance," with his eyes, one the color of blood shed too much, too often, the other gray and expanseless, filled with a depth she's never seen, one that excites her and scares her at the same time, but that's how it always is with him, she's used to the feeling of free-falling when he's close like this.

She gazes up at him, his mask dangling from one ear, headband pushed up, hair line sweaty, his arms full of her body and wet with her blood. He's scared, and that in itself is what gives her this knowledge, because if her sensei is scared, then Sakura knows it: she's going to die.

_Only nineteen, and to die so young..._but that is the way of the shinobi, to die in battle. To die defending the people you love, the ideals you stand for. It wasn't like that, though. She wasn't being _noble _or _brave_, she just reacted, swooped down in front of Kakashi before the blade of the man-such a heavy man, tall and strong and full of a hate and a rage that was palpable-could pierce him.

In some ways, she thinks, Kakashi was like the man's sword, like the edge of a very sharp knife, cutting in his good looks that went beyond simple attractiveness, tough like steel and metal and that wouldn't bend for anybody, so lethal in his actions.

Too bad he'd waited until now to show her these things, the caring, the concern, but damn, if she could get to live, life would be incredible. She could picture it, herself in his arms, held like a lover, and he would moan her name, caress it, moonlight shining in through the slats of the blinds onto their bed. He would fuck her hard, then slow, but hard again because he knew that's how she liked it, that she was a bad girl and needed pain mixed with her pleasure, just like him.

And it was laughable, really, that she should be fantasizing about a life she would not get the chance to lead with a man she had no right to, a man that she was not good enough for. He'd watched her grow from the hopeless, vain girl to the hopeless, broken woman she was today. Not much had changed, but her adoration for him had always been there, masked under a childish infatuation for Sasuke. She thinks he knows this, but can never be sure.

Then again, maybe a lot had changed, maybe the old Sakura really had blossomed into some semblance of a decent human being, one who had learned some of life's lessons and been lucky enough to survive them-until now.

_Until now._

"Sensei," She says, croaks out, because it's now or never and he has to know, for sure, "I need-"

"Stop," he interrupts. "Tell me later."

She can feel the wind on her face as he runs, faster and faster and the sky whirls above her, blue fading to velvety black, and she wants to promise him she will, she'll say everything, but her mother always told her never make a promise you can't keep, and the edges of her vision are blurring. She's slipping, but she thinks it isn't such a bad thing to die so close to the man she loves.

"Kakashi..." she whispers, and he holds her tighter, presses her into his chest.

He kisses her without thinking, because thinking wasn't necessary. It was a natural reaction, just like the gift in his blood can recognize and copy any jutsu, just like his reflexes that have kept him alive-until now.

_Until now._

He doesn't know when it happened, when Sakura Haruno worked her way into his heart like a shard of glass, almost painfully and ever-present. But it was soothed, that same ache, when she was near him, when she smiled or touched her cheek when she spoke, the way she tipped her head back when she laughed, how her eyes sparked when her mouth formed the word _cha!_

A hundred, thousand, little habits that differentiated her from every other woman in the world that he couldn't imagine living without. But the possibility was so real, was right in front of him, and how many times had he been here before? Holding a dying comrade in his arms, cursing himself for not being strong enough, fast enough, godly enough.

Her mouth burns beneath his, a spark of electricity and fire and passing between their bodies, the taste and feel of her pure chakra almost choking him, and it's so cliche that she would be as sweet as a cherry blossom, but he loves her even more for it.

Her arm falls limply from around his neck and he lifts it in his own, pressing her palm against his cheek. _Nineteen and to die so young..._

But he'll be damned if he's going to lose another one, another precious soul and the only person he's ever fallen for.

Lips like molten lava against her own, images of _him_ swimming above her. Her heart jumps, electrocuted with-what? _Him_. His essence, his being, the core of his heart. His chakra, could it be?

She wants to cry out, to tell him she's okay and to stop, doesn't he realize he's giving himself to her, pouring his own cells of energy into her body? And Jesus, it feels amazing, to be one with him, to know what he's made up of. She doesn't know if she _could _make him stop, even if she had the strength to push herself from him-she's never been that strong, though she's considered it before, even wished she was capable of separating herself from Kakashi. The last thing she needed was more heartbreak, more proof that she was a pathetic shinobi and didn't stand a chance in the real world.

It seemed that Sakura Haruno was a glutton for punishment, but as long as she could be with him she would handle the pain.

Now it was too late-but this wasn't so bad, had his chakra eased her dying? It was like she was slipping between something, between linoleum hallways and sterile instruments, the smell of disinfectant and fluorescent lights above her.

Time was out of reckoning, but time didn't matter when you were dead.

**oooo**

"It's been three days!" Naruto whines, his arm against the wall of Sakura's room.

Kakashi makes no notice of him, hasn't even acknowledged he is in the room, turning another page of his beloved book.

"You'd think the medical-nin would know something by now." Sasuke says, glaring at Kakashi like he was withholding the information about Sakura's condition on purpose.

"I will not let my beloved die! Tell me, oh great god of death, what must I do?" Rock Lee is on his knees beside Sakura's bed, his arms spread wide.

Ino rolls her eyes, moving from her spot next to Naruto, smacking Rock Lee on the back of the head. "Listen loser, she isn't going to die so stop saying weird stuff like that."

"Kak..." Sakura groans, and all eyes snap to her, but she says nothing more, still and quiet as though she really were dead.

"Patience, that is the way of the shinobi." Sasuke says, in a rare effort to give some comfort to his allies.

Ino rolls her eyes again, but her back is towards Sasuke. She'd never let him see her contempt.

**oooo**

The room is quiet, peaceful, full of sunlight when she wakes. They're alone-just the two of them.

"Sensei?" She says, and he is on his feet quicker than lightning.

"Sakura." There is a smile behind his mask, she is sure.

"I'm...dead. Right? In heaven...well, that makes sense." She is nodding, bringing her hands to her face, touching her cheeks, her hair.

"Makes sense?" Kakashi sits beside her on the bed, the hips touching. He takes her hand, clasps it between both of his.

"You're here." She says, as though it were obvious, and that explained everything.

"Right..."

"And you're my heaven, Sensei."

He lets out a small laugh, another grin. "You're not dead, Sakura. Very much alive. I'll prove it to you." He undoes his mask, raises her hand to his lips, brushes each knuckle individually, slowly. He hears her swallow loudly, and turns her hand over, kisses across her wrist, to the middle of her palm. "There now," he says, holding her wrist up to the light. "A healthy, strong pulse."

Sakura glares at him. "I hope you're enjoying yourself." She sniffs, but he has to be right, because Kakashi is beyond a 'heaven', he is so real, striking her heart and making it pound through her chest.

"Very much." He puts his mask back on, trails his finger tips across the underside of her forearm.

"What the hell is _that_?" Sakura asks, staring in disbelief at a life-sized bright pink velvet box in the shape of a heart. Across it, hung with an even brighter, pinker ribbon, is a blown-up picture of Sakura, taken right after she'd passed the exams to become a shinobi.

Kakashi laughed again. "It's from Lee."

"Lee? What was he doing here?"

"Begging for your release from the coils of Hades, mostly. They were all here, Sakura. Naruto and Sasuke and Ino, Lee-Hinata stopped by, too."

"And you cambe by too?" She says, pleased that he was worried about her, that he wanted to see her.

He looks at her, confusion in his one visible eye. "I haven't left, Sakura. I haven't left your side for three days."

She is silent, stunned. Does this mean-

"I thought I was going to die, too." He says, before he presses his lips softly to the corner of her mouth, and yes, there's no doubt about it, she is alive, her blood is on fire, and-and she is entirely his, as she always knew she would be.

"SAKURA!" A voice yells, before the door to her room is kicked off its hinges.

Lee enters, his arms full of roses, Naruto, Sasuke and Ino in quick tow.

Kakashi sighs and stands, his fingers lingering against hers for a moment. "I'll give you some time with your friends. But," he says, turning on the others, "visiting hours are over at five."

Sakura panics, not knowing when he'll be back, if he'll just leave and forget what he's said, what he's done, how he touched her and held her and saved her life...

His eye forms a happy crescent, he reads her mind, like she's one of his books lying open on the counter, but before he can say anything Naurto cackles. "Sakura and sensei, sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-"

"NARUTO!" Sakura screams as Kakashi slips from the room, her inner voice breaking through. She punches him into the wall with a resounding "_cha!_", but is forced back into bed by Lee and Ino.

She looks wistfully through the open door, where she can see Kakashi leaning against the wall, reading of course, but he looks up and when their eyes meet, she knows he will do everything his eyes promised.

**A bit...rough maybe? I don't know, it's my first venture into fic with this fandom. If I screwed it up, I apologize. If my vocab or something else is off, please let me know! Song used is Avalanche by David Cook. **


End file.
